I do my best to be honest on this blog. Some days I read my daily chapter of the bible and messages of love and insight come out, other days I don’t connect with the chapter and other days my mental health is so low it’s hard to come up with anything remotely insightful.

Today is one of those days.

I have been waking up lately with panic attacks. My anxiety peaks and I am unsure what is causing it. I feel lost, and nervous for what my work day will bring. My stomach is uneasy over things that have not happened. I feel like a prisoner in these feelings.

I listen to worship songs and read scripture and pray often but it doesn’t ease my feelings. I feel frustrated and disheartened. I think to myself: what am I doing wrong? What am I missing?

Do I really not love or trust God as much as I say I do? Do my circumstances dictate my moods more than my identity in Christ?

I pray for peace amidst my uneasiness, and I pray all of you who are also struggling with uneasiness and anxiety over our current health crisis that you are able to find peace.

2 thoughts on “Uneasiness

  1. My heart goes out to you my dear brother in Christ. I haven’t had anxiety attacks at least not as severe as I know others have had. One of my daughters has suffered from severe attacks and I know a Pastor who went for counselling because of anxiety attacks. The Pastor is a very Godly man so don’t beat yourself up about not being spiritual enough because you have anxiety attacks. There’s nothing wrong with going for counselling.

    The Bible tells us that we are a new creation and we are but that “old man” likes to try to pull us down. Praying and singing/praise songs are good. Remember that you can’t trust your feelings. Quote scripture back at your feelings; scriptures like,”God has not given me a spirit of fear but Power, Love and a Sound Mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7. Also, those other feelings are not from God.

    I was once given some advice that helped me when I started worrying about the “What ifs?” They said instead of thinking about negative,”What ifs”, change them into positive ideas. ex.Instead of thinking “What if staff dislike me for speaking to them about how they can do their job better, think, “What if the staff understands what I’m expecting of them and they improve and they get a promotion?” And remember that God is within you leading and guiding you. Your work is a ministry and God wants to help you succeed in your ministry. And at the right time, God may change your Ministry.

    You’re in my prayers and I’m certain that others are praying as well.


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