Anxious to Lead

I have some weight on my heart this morning that is starting to feel heavy. I empathize with Moses as I read Exdous. I am being called to manage the warehouse (a crew of 6 men) in the absence of my manager who is sick.

I’ve done it plenty of times but it’s been hard today. I feel a lot of fear and anxiety: am I going to have to handle interpersonal conflicts? What if one of my co-workers fights my orders and says “no”? Am I forgetting to do something important? Am I being fair to everyone?

My normal usually role is easy and stress-free but being directly incharge of others brings you into a whole new world. There are so many little issues that others don’t see. Things that when I miss even miss on an average but my manager had to bear daily.

I get exhausted and worried when I lead and sometimes I feel like I want to quit my job. But I have prayed countless times for God to build me stronger and more bold, less afraid and shy. I know the only way to get there is to wade through this mire of struggle.

I heard someone put it this way: “We are like a bow and arrow. In order for God to shoot us over a great distance he has to pull us back harder. The harder he pulls us back the further we’ll go.”

I pray for God’s supernatural strength and endurance today, that I may not shrink in the face of adversity. I can’t do this without Him in me, may I remember the further back I am pulled the farther I will soar!

One thought on “Anxious to Lead

  1. Colton, I am praying that you will do well and I encourage you with what Paul wrote to Timothy in 2 Timothy 1:7 “For God has not given us a Spirit of Fear but Power, Love and a Sound Mind.”

    That verse has helped me so often in my life. May it Bless you as well.


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